Things I Didn't Need To Know About People

I never was a fan of "All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten." Funny, but too simplistic. Instead, I had a really cool poster that stated matter of factly on it that truly "Everything I Need To Know About Life I Learned From Star Trek." Many good lessons came from that, one I take seriously. "Unless you're Mr. Scott, never wear red." Always a good rule. Shout out to Mr. Abrams for even including that in the latest Star Trek movie.

This week marks the end of the second month of me running our thrift store. And in the two months of me running it entirely, plus the 4 hours or more a week for two years, and two years of thrift store experience in high school, I have heard and seen more things about people than I ever thought I would. Sad, shocking, silly, and more. Since people have bought books about things we learned from Kindergarten and Trekkies have bought paraphernalia about the lessons learned from it, I figure I might share my list of "10 Things I Didn't Need To Know I Learned From Working In Thrift Stores.".

1."Does this fit right?"
"I don't know, it's a tight skirt, but what's too tight for you?"
"Well, can you tell I'm not wearing underwear?"
"Only when you sit."
"Great."
Ewww. Needless to say, if she hadn't bought it, I would have thrown it out due to ickiness.

2."Do you take American money?"
"Yep, sure do."
"Wow, that's new, since when?"
"Longer than I've been alive, I don't know the exact date but I would say at least
since 1959."
"Why is that?"
"That's the year that Alaska became the 49th state of the United State of America."
"Oh, so why don't you take Canadian money?"
"Because Canada refuses to accept our invitation to become the 51st state."
"What's the 50th?"
"Hawaii."
"Do they take American?"
Sing it with me, "this is the conversation that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends."

3."I'm going to go try these on."
"You're going to try on used clothes, before you wash them?"
"Yes, otherwise I won't know if they fit."
"Don't you feel dirty doing that?"
"Sometimes."
"So why do you do it?"
"I guess I like dirty."

4."Are these pants see through."
"Only when you stand in the light."
"How often does the sun shine here?"
"Not terribly often, but often enough that people would know more than they need to know."

5."Hey these pants fit great, what do you think."
"Sure, they fit great."
"I think I found some new pants to go bicycling in."
"Oh I don't think they'll work for that."
"What's that?"
"Those aren't pants, they're long underwear."
6."How much are your pants?"
"Honey, he's not going to sell you his pants, I think he needs them."
"No, I meant how much do the pants cost here?"
"Two dollars a pair sir.""That's a good price, but if I want to turn these pants into shorts, will you
charge less?"
"Honey, you're going to haggle at a thrift store?"
"Sure, he doesn't mind."
"Tell you what, the lowest price I can go for those pants is $1 a leg."
"See dear, I told you I could talk him down."

7."Do you have a senior citizens discount?"
"No we don't, its a discount store."
"But what about us seniors who could use a discounted price?"
"How old are you?"
"40."
"Sir, if we did have one, you wouldn't be old enough for it."
"I'm old in spirit."

8."Hi, I'm from the cruise ship, I work on it."
"Okay, welcome."
"No offense, but I was wondering where the girl who worked here last week is?"
"She's sick and I'm filling in for her today."
"Oh, will she be back next week."
"Probably, why do you ask?"
"I wanted to ask her out. What's her name?"
"I don't think she's your type."
"Why not, what's her name."
"Well, because she's married."
"That doesn't matter to me."
"It might matter to her husband."
"Oh I'm sure he'll never know."
"Too late, her name is Lisa and she's my wife."9."Would you sell me all the pantyhose you get in that are holy or have runs in
them, the ones you wouldn't normally sell."
"Sure if you'd like to buy them. You do crafts and potpourii with them?"
"No, I like the way my husband looks in them and I don't want to pay full price
for them just to put holes in them."

10."Hey Keisha, did you know that this guy doesn't just work and run this thrift
store, he's also the Pastor here at Salvation Army?"
"Holy ----!"
"Maam, I need to ask you to please watch your language in the store, this is a
family friendly place."
"You weren't kidding Mags, he is a pastor."

BLT says......you can learn a lot from working in a store with people. But......do you really want to?