Cleansing My Aura

I'm so against hibbidy dibbidy things that I've never even taken the time to learn how to spell the word aura, I probably spelled it wrong.

I've heard lots of wives' tales (which by the way I call hippy tales and not wives' tales, because the craziest stuff i ever heard came from hippies and not from wives). I've been told lots of crazy things that should make life easier, keep me healthier and all that jazz. Organics is one of those things I've been told repeatedly about and while I agree with trying to keep food as natural as possible, I don't agree with charging double the money for it which in the end is not healthier for me because it stresses me out trying to afford it. And as we all know stress is not too great for our systems, constant and/or in abundance. Also, in rural Alaska, organic produce takes too long to get here and hence is slightly moldy produce, but hey its healthier and more expensive so it must be good mold. Must be the kind of mold that cleanses my aura.

One of the hibbidy dibbidy things I've been told about repeatedly over the past three years is neti pot. People have recommended I use it and maybe it will help me get sick less often and when I do get sick it may make me better quicker. Its a tea pot you shove up a nostril and let the liquid drain out the other nostril which is supposed to make you feel better. When it comes to feeling better, my theory has always been "shoving things up anything does not make things better.

So I've heard about this pot, and I've politely thanked people for their advice while saying to myself "No way Jose." One time I actually asked someone who recommended it where you purchase one, to be nice. I figured, maybe if one of the two grocery stores has it I'll consider it. But if its the health food hippidy dibbidy store that has it, I ain't going. And where do you think they said I could purchase this nostril shoving marvel? At the organic market, and I figured it would be next to the aura cleansing crystals. No my resolve has always been, not for me, I'm no sucker."But then came today. I woke up after a good night's sleep, wanting to enjoy my morning Bible Study, and I felt like I hadn't slept all night. I went and looked at my complexion in the mirror, and while my reaction is usually, "Oh my that's bad," today it was "ugh, how did you not notice when Thomas the Tank ran over you yesterday?" I looked and felt terrible, which meant a day at home sick. It also meant a day being bossed around by my nurse, Mizz Lisa.

When I'm sick I just want to sleep in an over the counter induced semi-coma until I feel better. I don't like to eat (the only time that EVER happens), I don't like to drink, I want to be alone. Its funny because as a first aid trained lifeguard I know what I need to do to help others take care of themselves, but when it comes to myself all the training and common sense goes out the window. So, she makes me drink more than I want, makes me eat, and makes me take medicine, because she's wise and wants Grumpy the dwarf to be replaced with Happy the dwarf.

Today, when she came home from her run to the drugstore for my over the counter coma materials, I noticed she was lacking in a few of my usuals. She had replaced them with the nasal tea pot and told me I will be using it whether I like it or not. Not wanting to argue, because I would lose anyway with a not completely functioning mind, I just listened to her and inhaled the salt water ready to say I told you so.

What happened immediately shocked me, water went in one nostril and mucus came out the other in a steady stream. When I repeated with the other nostril and breathed in and out I could use my nose. The hibbidy dibbidy nose pot worked. I'm sold. I've used it three times today, and I feel 75% better, and think that with a good night's sleep I may be back to normal again. Now instead of dreading my day with the kids tomorrow, I actually believe I'll survive. Taking care of little ones when you're sick is pretty terrible for me, I'm slow and not very noticeable of things.

I'm even thinking I may use this thing a couple of times a week to keep my nostrils clean, especially in winter when I'm always stuffy. I can't believe it, I give one point to the hibbidy dibbidy's and apologize for doubting the nasal pot. Maybe next week I'll try cleansing my aura......................but I sincerely doubt it.

BLT says............sometimes I can be wrong (sometimes, and if you have lots of sinus problems, maybe you should give this hibbidy dibbidy neti pot a try.